Cummoangetaff!

The French visitors to Glasgow looked on blankly, as Big Aggie shouted out instructions to the queue of people waiting to board her tram on Argyle Street. 'If them that's cummin' oan'll get aff, them that's gettin' aff'll get oan better!' These adventures of Big Aggie MacDonald, the Glasgow tramcar clippie with the caustic wisecracking tongue, will take you back to the golden age of the tram. Her rich, biting patter, indiscriminately targeted at all and sundry, is the stuff for which streetwise Glaswegians have become renowned. In Aggie's day a hurl on a tramcar wasn't just another journey down to the shops - it was also a jaunt in an atmosphere of a constantly changing patois emanating from the likes of Big Aggie. In the realm of the tramcar, Big Aggie was queen and she did not suffer fools, tram inspectors and blue-rinse maidens from Milngavie lightly. They were all targets and always came away from a verbal confrontation with Big Aggie worse off but wiser. This new book by Allan Morrison revolves around seven short stories involving Aggie which are interspersed with 'Tramlines', which are one-liners and jokes attributed to Aggie. This is a perfect source for comic writers and after-dinner speakers looking for tram car material.